Staying Grounded During the Holidays with ADHD

The holidays can be an overwhelming time regardless of what you celebrate. Amplify that with struggles of executive dysfunction related to ADHD and it can feel near impossible to get to January unscathed. 

In this post, I will share some helpful tips and guidance to help with staying grounded during what is almost always a deregulating time, the holidays. 

The Pressure of Holiday Expectations

We all know the feeling of wanting to embrace what the holidays usually represent to us. Spending time with loved ones, enjoying each other's company, sharing meals, and giving gifts. However due to the nature of the fast paced society we currently live in, most of those warm feelings come loaded with a mountain of expectations that can typically place more stress on ourselves. 

Us with ADHD, our brains typically take in a whole lot more information and stimuli regardless of the time of year. So having to deal with these added stressors usually does the opposite of put us in the holiday spirit. 

Building a Grounding Routine That Works For Your ADHD

First things first, your routine will be disrupted if you are planning on spending the holidays with family, friends, or even not so loved ones, so know your baseline will be different. 

With that established, plan a grounding type strategy that you can seamlessly integrate into your new temporary routine during this time. “Seamlessly” can be taken very loosely in the sense that you may want to find ways to remove yourself from overstimulating situations for the time being. Whether that be going outside and feeling the cold air for 5 minutes or going to the bathroom and running cold water over your face or hands until you feel a little bit closer to baseline. 

Plan Ahead To Reduce ADHD Holiday Stress

Second, if you have the luxury of being able to plan ahead for this disruption, take some more time to yourself and plan out how you can best manage. The more information our brains can have, the better we can try to plan out how to manage when we get dysregulated.

This can look like asking for more information from the host (if you are not the host) of knowing how long it will take to get there, what food will be served (and if you can bring anything), who will be in attendance, and maybe even planning out how you will manage conversations with individuals where your values don’t align. 

Pro-tip for reframing frustration into curiosity, treat individuals who you know will bring up divisive conversations as a bingo board in your head. For example if you know your cousin will not use your preferred pronouns (which is incredibly disrespectful in the first place), mentally place a tick next to the “Did not use my preferred pronouns” box on your mental Bingo Card.

It doesn’t fix the disrespect but it helps to manage your reaction to it and treats it almost as a game. This is in no way promoting acceptance of their behavior but rather if you know they will not change their behavior, it can help to decrease the anxiety of it by mentally calling it out in the first place. 

Self-Care and Recovery After the Holidays

After the occasions are over with, recovery will be important. Make sure you are still drinking water, getting enough sleep, and getting in some movement for at least 20 minutes a day. These small steps might also be seen as luxuries in the stress of the holidays but if any of those routines are out of balance, it can make the other stressors feel more intense. 

If you have a partner or close friend, ask if you can just vent your frustrations, don’t discredit the opportunity for someone to hear you and provide support if possible. If you do not have someone to debrief with before or after the holidays, reach out to a therapist or use an AI platform to help validate and acknowledge some of your concerns. 

You can use this prompt from Forbes.com with your AI Chatbot: “Take the role of supportive coach and begin by asking me to share a daily update focusing on instances where I have noticed my mood or felt anxious. After I have shared my update, summarize patterns or observations from your perspective, offer reframing advice and share a practical step to take over the next 24 hours to address any issues you can identify relating to mood and anxiety”

*Please note that AI is not a human or a trained mental health professional and while it can provide meaningful and helpful information, do not solely rely on it for acknowledgement and validation. 

The holidays are dysregulating in general but that doesn't mean you will always just have to grin and bear it. Hopefully the above tips and tricks can help to make these times more cheerful and warm or at the very least .5% less terrible. 

How We Can Help

If the holidays leave you feeling overstimulated, burnt out, or like you're constantly trying to hold it together, just know you don’t have to keep managing it all by yourself. Therapy can be a grounding, judgment-free space to unpack the pressure, make sense of your ADHD patterns, and find strategies that actually work for your brain. 

We offer affirming support for neurodivergent adults navigating stress, relationships, and real life. Schedule a free 20-minute consultation today to see if therapy is the support you’ve been needing, not just for the holidays, but beyond.

Author Biography

Marie Clyne is a licensed social worker and provider at Catalyss Counseling. Her focus centers on adults struggling with depression, anxiety, and ADHD. Marie's passion lies in getting to know you, who you want to be, and working together to help translate those goals into reality. Follow Catalyss Counseling on LinkedIn, Facebook and Instagram.

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