The Role of Trust in Relationships

Trust is the foundation of happy relationships and forms the emotional backdrop in forming intimacy, as well as a sense of security and unity with another. In the beginning of a relationship, you may be consumed with the sense of attraction and elation of connecting with someone special.  

You spend time together, share, and do things all with the aim of earning and sharing trust. Over time, you evaluate whether you have common interests and values with the other, weighing the degree of confidence you may have in the other’s consistency, competence, and integrity.  

Key Questions to Assess Trust in Your Relationship

Sharing trust involves taking personal and emotional risks with the other in the relationship.  As you share time and energy with them, in your heart you may be asking yourself:

• Do this person’s actions align with their words?  Are they truthful and transparent?

• Does this person follow through with responsibilities?

• Can I trust this person to support me emotionally?  Will this person act with care and compassion toward me?

• Will this person have my best interests in mind during times of difficulty and stress?

Answering these questions helps you decide how much comfort you can have in a relationship.  However, nobody is perfect – we all make mistakes, so people let us down from time to time. 

Overcoming Past Hurts to Trust Again in a Relationship

When we feel let down by another we can get consumed with feelings of hurt, anger, and insecurity. These feelings seem like they will last forever – but they don’t. Knowing how to forgive, repair, and reset your relationship is essential to restoring trust in the relationship. It can help you give the benefit of the doubt to your partner.  

Then again, a person may be very trustworthy, but are you able to trust? Perhaps past traumas and hurts inhibit your ability to fully invest in another’s good will. In my experience, healing these wounds helps us trust ourselves more by getting in touch with our values and goals. It is then that we can begin to trust our perceptions and judgments.

Earning and Sharing Trust in a Relationship

Trust is not a given in relationships – it must be earned and shared. Earning trust is difficult and involves taking responsibility for yourself, to yourself, and to another. It involves showing genuine interest in the other person and investing in mutual growth and healing.

It includes taking honest responsibility for your behavior in your relationships. Following through with commitments and doing what is best for the relationship. 

Are You a Trustworthy Partner in Your Relationship?

Let’s look at the following questions that reflect on your trustworthiness:

• Do I have the ability to follow through with the responsibilities of the relationship well enough?

• Can I keep up with the relationship responsibilities consistently?

• Will I do what is right in the relationship?

• Can I act with care and kindness to others as individuals?

  
  

How Couples Can Build Trust in Their Relationship

As a couples therapist, my aim is to not only get people through their current crisis, but help set them on a path that transforms the way they connect to their partner. By utilizing each of their strengths. I have learned that happy couples cultivate trust even in the small moments of the relationship. They think of what is better for the relationship as a whole, rather than focusing on just themselves.

Trust is essential in any relationship, but it takes time and effort to build and maintain. If you’re feeling uncertain about trust in your relationship or struggling to reconnect with your partner. Couples counseling may be exactly what you and your partner need.

How We Can Help

At Catalyss Counseling, we help couples strengthen their relationships by fostering trust, communication, and deeper connection. If you’re ready to work toward a healthier, more fulfilling relationship, reach out today to see how we can support you.

Schedule a FREE 20-minute phone consultation below and begin your journey towards a calmer, more balanced life!

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Author Biography

Tom Henry is a therapist with Catalyss Counseling who helps high achieving, busy couples, including parents, to resolve conflicts, communicate clearly, find solutions, and identify the strengths of your relationship so you can rebuild trust, develop a connection, and create mutual respect. Follow Catalyss Counseling on LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram.

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Other Therapy Services Available at Catalyss Counseling:

Here at Catalyss Counseling, we want to meet all of your counseling needs in the Denver area. Our supportive therapists provide depression counseling, therapy for caregiver stress, grief and loss therapy, stress management counseling, and more. We also have specialists in trauma and PTSD, women's issues, pregnancy and postpartum depression or anxiety, pregnancy loss and miscarriage, and birth trauma. For therapists, we can also provide clinical supervision! We look forward to connecting with you to help support your journey today.