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Why Men Should Seek Counseling

Updated: Sep 29, 2023

group of men seeking counseling in Colorado

Is it true? Are men less likely to seek help for mental health? Are men less likely to engage in emotional dialog within social groups? Are men more likely to ignore or develop exterior layers to mask their feelings? Are men less comfortable sharing their feelings and emotions with others in both work and home life? Yes, Yes, Yes, Yes and….you guessed it….Yes.

Men, How did we get here?

Many studies have aimed at answering that question and I won’t bore you with jargon or difficult-to-decipher language. The simple answer is that men took many steps to get here in addition to social norms formed by society and parents. It begins early in childhood and is often reinforced throughout life by words, actions, and modeling. Did you know that both male and female parents are less tolerant of hearing a male child cry than a female child?

Childhood Conditioning Impacts Men’s Emotional and Social Success

Childhood conditioning impacts men's emotions

What do you see when you look on a playground or in a group of kids? Often female children choose to divide up into small distinct social groups and engage in play that practices social skills. The girl-heavy groups include describing and sharing emotions and feelings. They figure out what to share and what to keep under wraps. How to express and communicate their emotions and feelings.

Men tend to focus on physical action centered activities and individual performance.

Often male children engage in practice based on competition and primarily physical competition. They figure out a hierarchy based on feats of physical strength. This can often lead to focus on individual performance and isolate thoughts, feelings, and sharing internally. This may be out of fear, competitive mindset, and/or lack of opportunity.

Today, Times are Changing in the World of Men’s Mental Health.

Parents are encouraging children to describe and share their feelings, emotions and work toward proactive intervention in place of reactions to explosive or blowups. In effect, some individual and social behaviors are beginning to change. Even as I write these words down, I acknowledge that the schoolyard is changing. Children and young men are being coached and trained to use words and understand their feelings and emotions.

Competition Encourages Isolation from Feelings, Emotions and Higher Brain Functions for Men

Is competition all bad? Of course not. Men have always used competitive spirit to improve and become more capable. Physically capable, mentally focused, and successful. But have you used it to improve insight into yourself and your social surroundings? Your success in work systems can be enhanced with cooperation and communication. Did you ever think you would focus on reading the words social skills growth opportunity?

Men, when you think about social events, is there solid ground under your step?

Have you found yourself in unsure situations when faced with these new-to-you challenges? How much attention should you give to your feelings and emotions? How much and to whom should you share? How much vulnerability should you display outwardly to your thoughts, feelings, and emotions? Are you angry, frustrated or stressed. Or are you anxious, unsure, fearful, avoidant, or maybe even depressed?

Men Are Out of Practice with Intimate and Productive Relationships

Men's issues and how to fix them with a therapist in Colorado

You are capable. You are capable of finding creative ways to complete tasks and survive. You may choose to compartmentalize the emotions and deal with them later through physical activity, drinking, or moments of explosive behavior. You may stay on guard for the possibility of a fight. You may dig your heels in and halt productivity. Maybe you put up a wall for everyone around you.

You might just stay in isolation. On an island of one.

Opportunity is knocking for Men’s Mental Health and support in communication and engagement.

There is awareness and support for a new way of interacting with other men, women, children and entire communities. As men improve their communication, relationships, and individual men's mental health, the entire social web benefits. Imagine men who are sports coaches, musicians, engineers, site supervisors, managers and CEOs who are tuned in and engaging.

You can choose another route. You can start to practice. The best way to get started is in a setting designed to allow for honing skills, gaining personal insight, and eventually practicing interactions with others.

Choose to Join a Men’s Support Group

You can get started by practicing in a small number of relationships with a professional counselor guiding the group. A men’s support group is a great safe practice space that allows the skills you develop to help you build a regimen that leads to transforming your emotions and feelings. You don’t have to worry about the group impacting your work as you practice your skills or impacting your family should you make some mistakes.

You also have the opportunity to hear from other men who are also dedicating time to improve their communication and relationships in their lives. Just like how you show up to football practice 5 days a week or to the shop. You can develop powerful tools of success in your life and work goals.

Individual Counseling is also a Good Place To Start

Sometimes a private tutor or coach would serve you best. You don’t have to ignore your emotions or numb yourself to them. You don’t have to think of them as weaknesses. In fact, when you learn to use your emotions and feelings in a positive driven way, you can be greater than you have ever been. When you understand why explosions of emotions are happening and have space to practice moving between our natural and primitive reactions and our higher level thinking. Both are important and necessary.

Did You Know That Your Body Physically Peaks in Your 20’s?

If you are like me, you are thinking there is no way that is true. Have you seen 20-year-olds? I ran my best long distances in my 30’s or early 40’s. Or I really fine-tuned my bow-hunting skills in my 30’s. How can that be possible?

Using our Minds and Emotions to Overcome Our Aging Bodies

Men issues in Colorado and support groups with a therapist

In our 30’s and 40’s we utilize our mental and emotional toughness to overcome the decline in our physical bodies. We have the ability to overcome our loss of physical peak fitness by using our brains and our hearts. We stay disciplined. We believe in ourselves.

Get Social in a New Way and Benefit From it.

Sometimes that may lead you to decide an individual counseling session that is completely confidential is the way to go. One that allows you space to process and practice knowing you don’t have to be perfect at it.

A Counselor is Like a Personal Trainer.

A therapist is capable of helping you grow and understand your thoughts, feelings, actions, reactions, and modality of thinking. A therapist is capable of reflecting on what you need to see about yourself. That way you can grow. It’s a one-on-one relationship to process, gain insight into yourself, and offer the freedom to help support the goals you what to achieve.

Another Benefit of Group Therapy and Men's Support Groups

Sometimes your journey may lead to group counseling. A men’s group is a great place to process and practice your skills with other men interested in similar goals. A men’s therapy group can offer many perspectives and support. You can express and experience how other men are tackling their goals and working toward successful social integration of their newly developed skills.

In the End I Hope You Find Your Way to Therapy, Support, Growth and The Social Relationships That Serve You Well.

When it’s all said and done, you will find that individual counseling sessions or group counseling sessions could be the opportunity you are looking for. You will be surprised at the insight into yourself that is possible.

Therapy Can Help Your Relationships, Men

You will be surprised to find relationships with current or future romantic interests will become more rewarding. Your social interactions with your friends, coworkers, and acquaintances will begin to yield new forms of success. Your work and home life will be impacted.

A New Social Identity Awaits on the Other Side of Therapy and Counseling for Men’s Mental Health.

You can choose a new social identity. And once you believe that and understand yourself on the inside, you will be amazed that others will notice on the outside. It will start to pour out of you and into your surroundings. It will be slow at first but as people start to notice they will begin to choose different ways of interacting with you too. Communication, self expression, personal insight, trust in romantic relationships, improved collaboration with work relationships, healthy dialogue and more are all possible outcomes.

How Much Longer Do You Want to Wait to Engage in Men's Therapy, Men’s Support Groups, or Both?

Why wait any longer to get started? Now is the time to take ownership of your opportunity for a new way of interacting with others. It is easier to get started than you think. Just make a call, set up an appointment and show up with an open mind.

How We Can Help

Justin specializes in working with men to help them live life they would like to live!

Justin has a few limited openings for our Affordable Counseling Program! Learn more about Justin here.

If you are looking for general support, or if you would like to talk to someone more about how we can help you, follow these simple steps:

  1. Contact us today for a free 20-minute phone consultation

  2. Or, you can book directly online with the therapist of your choice

  3. Begin your journey towards a calmer, more relaxed life

Other Therapy Services Available at Catalyss Counseling:

Author Biography

Justin Norton is a student intern and a provider for the affordable counseling program at Catalyss Counseling. He works with men, adults who have lost direction in their life, and burned out professionals to regain purpose and meaning so they can become who they have always wanted to be. Follow Catalyss Counseling on LinkedIn, Facebook and Instagram.

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